First published in Column 8 in 1993 (and later online under my Poems and Short Fiction blog in 2019). It relates to my surprise that the scientific world seems so obsessed with 'selling' dinosaurs to children.
I’ve had enough of dinosaurs,
Especially Hadrosaurs.
Dinos must rank, I think, as the
All-time greatest bores.
Who cares about some fifty tonnes of
Hefty Brontosaurus
Shoving all his weight around and asking:
‘Don’t you adore us?’
Who wants to meet and greet some
Rampant Iguanodon,
Marketing his lizard look
Until I feel quite put upon.
Who gives a hoot about a coot called
Rex Tyrannosaurus,
And whether on his nastier days he’d
Gouge and rip and gore us?
Euparkeria, Hypsilophodon, your
Names trip off my tongue –
NOT!
Triceratops, Coelophysis, your
Praises they ain’t sung.
Compsognathus, Dimorphodon, you
Thought you ruled the land;
You missing links, you’re all extinct – I
Wish you all were banned.
You poor deficient dinosaurs, you
Denizens long gone.
Scarce good it did you, lumpy brutes, being
Weighed up by the tonne.
Go back where you belonged, you lot, in your
Dim Cretaceous time,
And let me try and end this rot with a
Non-Jurassic rhyme.
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| My wife (on the right) and I disguised as dinosaurs at a grandchild's themed party. |
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